Those middle years are interesting, aren’t they? From the time your child is born until they leave the nest, it’s not uncommon for parents to tie up their “Why” in things that involve spending time with the family. Of course, it’s a good thing to want to be there during these years. There’s nothing more fulfilling than watching your children grow and reach their full potential.
The problem is, there will come a day when the kids leave, and suddenly your “Why” doesn’t exactly fit the way it used to. Sure, you still want to be part of your kids’ lives, but they aren’t the prime motivation for every action anymore. This is where you might start feeling a little lost.
If you need a new “Why” once the kids are grown, but you’re not sure anymore who exactly you are when they’re not around, this article is for you. Let’s look at some ideas on finding your “Why” at this stage in your life.
What is Your Parenting Expectation Now?
Just because the kids moved out doesn’t mean you’re done parenting. Are you expected to be a babysitter for the grandkids? Do your kids still rely heavily on you for advice? Your “Why” might not have changed as much as you think. Be sure to figure these expectations into what drives you in the future.
What Are Your Interests?
Are there hobbies or activities you’ve been putting off during the parenting years that you’d like to explore now that you have a little more time? If you’re not sure, it might be time to explore some new ideas. Your local community college offers a wide range of classes designed for older adults, as do community centers. Look for lessons, lectures, and other experiences which allow you to try new things without a lot of commitment until you get an idea of what you like.
What Are Your Talents?
Does your new “Why” involve creative pursuits? If you’ve been ignoring your hobbies, you might feel a bit rusty picking up the trumpet you used to play. This is a great time to see if you still like things which you used to enjoy.
What Inspires You?
Are there causes which you’ve felt strongly about, yet you never had time to explore? This might be the perfect time to volunteer on an election committee or with another organization. Your new “Why” might involve activism.
What Have You Always Dreamed of Doing?
Do you have certain goals you’ve been dreaming about for ages but never had the time for? Your new “Why” might involve making some of those ideas a reality.
These next years should be exciting and interesting as you form your new “Why.” Be careful, though. After years of making sure your “Why” was about somebody else, you might be tempted to do the same now. Be sure to create a guiding force that honors your hopes and dreams. You’ve earned this!
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